I don't know why I do this {every time I see a pregnant woman}. Why my mind wanders back to the time of infertility and all the pain it came with {I know what you're thinking, Get over it. Don't worry, I think it too}. My mind often thinks {way too often it thinks}, "you would have a two year old by now if you got pregnant when you were suppose to".
I get sad, upset....then I finally remember..."oh yeah, I was pregnant {and loved it} and my baby is two feet away from me". {go away devil, I hate you} "Errr. Ange! forget about it!"
But, man! Its a hard challenge to completely forget about. As if we never went through it.
Two WHOLE years went by before we saw the positive sign on that test. That's a LOT months of disappointment/sadness/anger.
I need to remind myself DAILY {yep, daily}, that life is now how God meant it to be. For us to have our two month old, Elijah, not a two year old....
I hate this struggle {hate it hate it hate it} . Maybe one day I will/can forget.
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